Charlie's Blog

石橋を叩いて渡る

(Ishibashi o tataite wataru) 

Japanese proverb meaning, “Cross a bridge only after checking it thoroughly” 

Making decisions is tough for a lot of us. Making good decisions is even tougher.

Yet we really do make decisions all the time – why is this even a topic? We decide what we are going to eat, what we are going to wear, what we want to watch or listen to, who we are going to hang out with and many other things.

However, you did not decide to read this for the everyday decisions. We are not worried about these ones. It is the big ones we struggle with.

The big decisions affect us in more ways than one. They affect our loved ones, our careers, our health, our wealth, our well-being. Sometimes, they are a matter of life and death. They affect our mood, mental health and finances.

Some of the big decisions include deciding your occupation, who to marry, whether to marry, to have children, to start a business, to apply for a job, to go to that university, to live in that neighbourhood, to buy that car, to take that loan, to call that relative, to forgive the hurt, to press charges, to ask for help, to become more active, to get the gym membership, to reduce the alcohol, the watch the weight, to get that credit card, to invest, to migrate to another country, to run for office and so on and so forth.

Yeah baby! Decisions, decisions, decisions. This is the challenge of freedom – being confronted with choices.

How does one make good decisions?

Sometimes, we can’t even make a decision. Everything grinds to a halt. Yes, I know – I have been there before.

Some of our vacillation is because we don’t want to get it wrong, with our action. We can’t afford to get it wrong. We don’t want to lose out. We don’t want a bad outcome. We are afraid. So we hum and haw. We are in two minds. We procrastinate. We put off making the decision – sometimes we hope someone else will make it on our behalf.

Many times, we have to make decisions that serve us well because resources are finite – well, for a lot of us. For some people, they have to make a choice between driving the Bentley or getting chauffered in the Rolls. For others, it’s a walk or the bus, or their 10-year old Volkswagen Passat.

Personally, I prefer the Rolls.

Sometimes, we make bad decisions.

We rushed it. We ruined it.

We let emotions cloud our judgment. We were angry. We just wanted to fit in. We went against our better judgment. Afterwards, we regret it. Then we wish we had done something different. Something wiser.

These days there are software applications for multi criteria decision making. I tried out a few of those when I was at university. That is talk for another day. It just shows decision making can be serious business. For now, let’s keep it simple, shall we.

Whatever your circumstances, if you want to excel or succeed with your life, then you want to pay attention to how you make the BIG decisions.

We must start with making good small decisions. Watch the effect of these. Your health, wealth and well-being may be in these too.

Take your time to think about the consequences of big decisions – who and what may be affected, how it might affect them and how long the effect will last.

Don’t rush.

Get a second opinion, then a third and a fourth if necessary.

Do your research.

Speak to your mentor.

Allow your blind spots to be exposed.

After you have consulted with your trusted others, and you have the facts, the pros and the cons, it’s time to act.

Go for it.

It may not be much clearer than that.

The results you get will determine how good your decision was.

Pay attention to the results of your decisions. Use that to train yourself on how to make future decisions. Afterall, practice makes perfect.

So, what’s it going to be?

To be or not to be – are you ready for the next big decision?

You decide.

石橋を叩いて渡る

(Ishibashi o tataite wataru) 

Japanese proverb meaning, “Cross a bridge only after checking it thoroughly”